Weaponization of Horror: The Shelter System That Tried to Kill Me

(2 min video – content warning: abuse, violence, assault)*

I entered the Bay Area shelter and housing system looking for safety.
What I found was horror deliberately baked into the system.

Shelters and housing that humiliate, retaliate, starve, endanger, and discard women.
Predators protected. Victims punished.
Reports destroyed. Mandated reporters silent.

I documented everything—hundreds of videos, police reports, a 25-page formal complaint. Below you will find an extremely condensed version of events.

This is not a broken system.
It is designed this way.

St. Vincent de Paul, Oakland

• Conditions: Line up nightly, pull out a bed, pack up in the morning. Kicked out during the day. Food was edible, but staff treated us as scum.

• Threats:

  • Director Leland told me: “You better stop documenting if you know what’s good for you.”

  • My dentist, a mandated reporter, filed a police report after I told her.

• Weaponized “care”:

  • Blanket deprivation threats.

  • Staff shaming women for menstruation—no pads or tampons provided.

  • No reproductive health care (Depo shots), only COVID vaccines.

• Disappearance:

  • A woman named Takesha disclosed rape. Staff ignored her, then expelled her for drinking her own water.

  • She never returned. I filed a missing person report. Police responded by sending mental health evaluators on me.

“Horror itself becomes the weapon—proof women are ‘crazy,’ instead of proof we’re in danger.”

Crossroads Shelter, East Oakland

• Clique of women targeted me with harassment.
• False accusation: that I was masturbating.
• Male social worker confronted me at my bed, lecturing me in public. I filed a grievance.
• Later: female staff burst into dorm at night, fists up: “I saw you. I caught you. Get out right now.”
• I called police and filed a report.
• Result: I was “exited” from the shelter. The abusive staff stayed.

BACS All-Women’s Shelter, Emeryville

• Director was new, smart, and caring. But staff under her were violent.
• Psychotic roommate harassed me for coughing while I was sick from exposure. Staff escalated against me.
• Abusive staff threatened me: “I’m going to fucking roll you.” Witnessed by others. I called police.
• Meeting: With director, high-level administrator, and placement staff (who was ashamed and tried to help).
• Their message: “If you call the police every time she shows up, we can’t have you here.”
• Result: I was exited. The violent staff stayed.

“When shelters expel older women with nothing, they aren’t enforcing rules. They are committing murder by policy.”

BACS Navigation Center, Berkeley (8 months)

• Corruption:

  • Furniture grant scam—clients promised furniture, ordered it, never received it.

  • Section 8 housing handed out to men regularly. Almost no women got it.

  • Staff flaunted wealth (fancy cars).

• Community:

  • Women: smart, caring, concerned about the world.

    • When the Gaza war started, they gathered around my bed and asked me to explain it.

  • Men: mostly predatory or addicted. One exception—a political operative I respected.

• Predator protected:

  • Male resident preyed on women and a gay man.

  • Older Jewish MD resident harassed by him → screamed one night → she was expelled, not him.

  • I confronted leadership: they claimed “no reports.” But I saw multiple men writing reports that morning. Staff were throwing them away.

  • I only reported by email after that, so they couldn’t destroy the record.

• Food & Hunger:

  • Supposed to provide 3 meals/day. Only served lunch—disgusting, inedible.

  • Residents starving. Food stamps stolen.

  • I hid food under my bed to survive.

• Personal Betrayal:

  • While starving, I saw my son’s Instagram—he was in Europe with a girlfriend, posting photos of rich food.

  • I messaged him: “Your mom is starving in a shelter while you travel through Europe. This is not the boy I raised.”

• SSI Attempts:

  • Applied with help of Homeless Action Committee.

  • Rejected twice.

  • Lawyer ignored disclosures of abuse—mandated reporter, but never reported.

BACS Housing (HUD Housing)

• Finally placed in HUD housing with another resident.
• I Entered Bay Area Shelters Seeking Safety. What I Found Was Horror.(Content warning: abuse, violence, assault)530 videos. Dozens of police reports. A 25-page formal complaint. Zero change.I entered the Bay Area shelter and housing system looking for safety. What I found was horror deliberately baked into the system.These shelters humiliate, retaliate, starve, endanger, and discard women. Predators protected. Victims punished. Reports destroyed. Mandated reporters silent.This is not a broken system. It is designed this way.---St. Vincent de Paul, OaklandConditions: Line up nightly, pull out a bed, pack up in the morning. Kicked out during the day. Staff treated us as scum.Threats: Director Leland warned: “You better stop documenting if you know what’s good for you.”Weaponized “care”: Blanket deprivation threats. No pads or tampons. No reproductive care — only COVID vaccines.Disappearance: A woman named Takesha disclosed rape. Staff ignored her, then expelled her for drinking her own water. She never returned. When I filed a missing-person report, police retaliated by sending mental health evaluators on me.“Horror itself becomes the weapon—proof women are ‘crazy,’ instead of proof we’re in danger.”---Crossroads Shelter, East OaklandClique of women targeted me with harassment.False accusation: that I was masturbating.Male social worker confronted me at my bed, publicly lecturing me. I filed a grievance.Later, female staff burst into dorm at night, fists up: “I saw you. I caught you. Get out right now.”I called police and filed a report.Result: I was “exited.” The abusive staff stayed.---BACS All-Women’s Shelter, EmeryvilleDirector was new and caring, but staff under her were violent.Sick with exposure, I coughed. A psychotic roommate harassed me. Staff escalated against me.Staff threatened: “I’m going to fucking roll you.” Witnessed by others. I called police.In a meeting with administrators, I was told: “If you call the police every time she shows up, we can’t have you here.”Result: I was exited. The violent staff stayed.“When shelters expel older women with nothing, they aren’t enforcing rules. They are committing murder by policy.”---BACS Navigation Center, Berkeley (8 months)Corruption: Furniture grant scam. Section 8 given to men, almost never to women. Staff flaunted wealth.Community: Women — smart, caring. Men — mostly predatory. One man preyed openly on women and a gay resident.Predator protected: Older Jewish MD harassed by him screamed one night → she was expelled, not him.I saw men writing reports that morning. Staff later claimed “no reports.” They were throwing them away. I began reporting only by email to preserve a record.Food & Hunger: Only one disgusting meal/day. Residents starving. Food stamps stolen. I hid food under my bed to survive.Personal Betrayal: While starving, I saw my son’s Instagram — traveling Europe with his girlfriend, posting lavish meals. I wrote: “Your mom is starving in a shelter while you travel through Europe. This is not the boy I raised.”SSI Attempts: Rejected twice. Lawyer ignored my disclosures of abuse — a mandated reporter, but never reported.---BACS HUD HousingFinally placed in HUD housing with another resident.Promised furniture — only a bed.Documented horrific conditions in 530 videos and a 25-page report.Sent to HUD and multiple authorities. No response. Even HUD’s own complaint line — posted in the building — did nothing.I was in horrific danger.---Mandated Reporters Who FailedLawyers, therapists, medical staff, shelter staff.All mandated to report abuse and danger.All refused. Reports ignored, destroyed, silenced.Not one faced consequences.---The PatternWeaponized scarcity: blankets, food, pads withheld.Predators protected: rapists and abusers allowed to stay.Victims expelled: retaliation for speaking up.Reports destroyed: paper trails erased.Mandated reporters silent: legal obligations ignored.This is not negligence. It is policy.---ConclusionBay Area shelters and housing are not safety nets. They are weapons of horror.Victims degraded, endangered, starved, expelled. Predators protected. Reports destroyed. Mandated reporters silent.I documented it all: 530 videos, dozens of police reports, formal complaints. Nothing changed.This is not a broken system. It is designed this way.What must happen:An independent audit of Bay Area shelters and HUD contracts.Survivors, not abusers, must run oversight.Until then, every denial, every expulsion, every disappearance is not a “failure of care” — it is murder by policy.